Friday 3 February 2017

What is down

Japanese Tea Garden, San Francisco, May 2011


Missed

Who talks about despair?
It’s boring, a deep hole.
And what to say?
The dance is hard.

You felt it, for sure;
The evidence is stone.
But we can’t talk about it,
Not now.




RF 2017


It's been a while since I wrote anything even remotely about my Dad. He killed himself way back in 1973 and Mum died in 2010 so her loss kind of took over, in the parental bit of my mind, from the very old history of his. But I suppose the fact that there is so much news just now that can depress a decent caring person (i.e. all the people I like online and in the flesh) has brought thoughts of depression back into the foreground for me (what it is, how to deal with it, how to get things done in a world that seems so difficult and... mental at times). I'm not depressed myself, I should point out. I do feel down here and there but usually with good reason. And there is much to feel good about just now too... we join together, we oppose together, we do not let them pass...

6 comments:

hope said...

I keep hearing Michelle Obama's words, "They go low, we go high." I try to stick to the high road but lately, it's been kinda lonely up there. :)

Glad I still have folks like you in my life to remind me that life is good.

Rachel Fox said...

They certainly are going low... and of course to them it's high...
x

Niamh B said...

Beautiful poem Rachel, and with that context, it's extremely moving. Sorry for your loss.
I just finished reading Prozac Nation, which I wouldn't recommend to anyone looking for a light lark by the way. But I will say I agree with you on the opposing together thing, and in some ways weird bad things might bring more good about than the status quo, if it makes us more motivated to reclaim and fight for goodness and be good to each other, it allows us discuss and think about things more and make ourselves clear in our own heads perhaps - we do have to just take whatever good we can find...

Rachel Fox said...

It's a very old loss, Niamh, but thanks for the thoughts anyway. I suppose it has always made me view depression and suicide in a very particular and, in some ways, personal way.
There seems to be a fair amount of fightback just now, in the US and elsewhere, and from some unexpected sources in some cases. That's great to see!

The Bug said...

That's a beautiful poem - spare & lovely. And very fitting for our times, except that everyone I know is talking talking talking about how desperate things are now.

Rachel Fox said...

Resistance is good though - long may it continue!

And I suppose the despair in this poem is more the lonely, everyone-else-seems fine business...

x